Onion Glasses

There is an attractive man that walks his dog in the field behind my house. What is the best way to get him to?

notice me? Should I press myself up against the kitchen window and wait for him to notice me, or should I be a little more straight forward and just hide in the bushes and use my night vision goggles to stalk him? I thank you all for your help with this delicate matter. Good morning to all of my favorite people!

Public Comments

1. Good morning my friend! You don't have to do all that...just go out in your front yard, yell "HEY!", and then lift up your top; mission accomplished!
2. Kidnapp him and put him in your Cellar, Works the best!
3. get a dog and walk it naked
4. The man, or the dog?
5. When i want to catch a mouse, I hide some cheese 'till that lil critter smells it and goes for the bait. Hope this helps
6. I would actually do both. That way, you're communicating with him night and day. I would also incorporate some Jazz Hands in there as well. Go and introduce yourself to him and when he begins to speak...just tell him "Shut your mouth or I'll eff it".
7. just go round where he walks about at that time and when he comes just say hi at first and gradually build it up and start talking to him more and more he might find it a bit weird if you go straight for it, but do flirt a little so he get the message.
8. I think you should smother yourself in syrup, hide in a hedge, and when he walks by you should fall to the floor and writhe about dramatically.
9. dress like a mailman. the dog will attack you. when he is done tearing at your flesh, the studly dude will owe you one. tell him to special deliver his giant parcel into your mail box. or something like that. leave me alone. oly out
10. I'd follow him home, go into his basement and then crawl into his attic and drill lookey holes....but that's my answer to everything. Or, you can hang your undies out to dry and wait for him to come and steal them. That's how Val caught me. ~Squeezles for Beaver Person~
11. Wait, I don't walk my dog near your house..... ;0
12. Start off slow. First, press yourself against the window. The following week, hide in the bushes The week after that, toss a net over him and drag his @ss home with you
13. get a dog and walk it when he walks his lol ;-)
14. get a dog and start walking it at the same time this man is walking is. dress kinda skimpy. bend over and pet the dogs a lot
15. put a bag over him and chain him to the bedroom...not that i ever done this but it works..
16. get a milking stool and start shaving your snatch in the backyard. " Pardon me, Good Sir. I seem to have knicked myself... Would you perhaps have on your possession a styptic pencil?"
17. I would set up camp out in the field, pitch a tent, set up lawn chairs, start the BBQ, have an ice chest full of beer, and get a supply of milk bones. If he doesn't notice you forget about him.
18. OK this didn't come from me. Steal your neighbors cat. Put a shock collar on the poor little puss. Wrap your cankles thickly in the best bacon. Put on the Vicky's Secret nightie. When he comes in to view turn the kitty loose and shock it. Then chase it like you are going to the rescue. Unless he is blind and deaf he will notice you. His puppy will lead him to your door.
19. Just before he shows up, rub yourself with bacon. The dog will come over, so happy and excited to see you. This will impress the man, that his dog took to you so fast, he'll want to marry you on the spot. Or Bunji pit.
20. Ask him if he'd like to make a division sign with you, splitting the sweater pies. Tell him the dog can watch. %
21. Just walk right up to him and give him a hug. Mouth or topless, your choice...
22. Hey Cel...You know if it were me I'd just pitch a tent in his front yard, make a voodoo doll of him, & start serenading him with songs and love poems at night...That should totally work.
23. oh stop being silly
24. Make a milk bone trail to your backyard & when his dog drags him into your yard pull his hair just to make sure it's really his. It should be all downhill from there!
25. walk up and flash the dog. it might be inhumane, but the dog will stop to atleast yelp!! :))
26. do you have a 'cellar' ?? lol
27. From what I hear you got some extra super exquisite beaver boobies, why not use them in your favor? ;)